IT IS JULY 1ST, 2023

AND RENT IS DUE

Community Updates:

• Management is aware that the south elevator is still experiencing issues. Repairs are still underway. Noise and viscera are being pumped out of the adjoining hallway and outside. Complaints can be sent to me to be forwarded to Management's email as necessary.
• If you have seen the Custodians' Vacuum, please inform Management as soon as possible. The Custodians are hungry.
• Any and all debris, blood, feedback, and fire resulting from the End Of Blaseball is being managed by local authorities. Sidewalks, portals, wormholes, and other forms of self-transport will be operable as soon as feasible. DO NOT COMPLAIN TO MANAGEMENT LEST WE HAVE A RETURN OF THE "PUNISHMENT SPHERE."
• We're expecting to have a hot July this year! The Lord of Ash is expected to set a few wildfires near the complex, so make sure to wear your firescreen when out on the patio!

Community Calendar

• July 5th: Dependence Day! Celebrate all you are dependent on! AS PER RENTAL AGREEMENT, LACK OF PRESENTS FOR MANAGEMENT WILL RESULT IN INCREASED RENT.
• July 7th: Day of Luck. Scratch cards, lotto tickets, and keno tickets will be made available for purchase from 8am to 4pm in the lobby. Try your luck on 7/7!*
• July 26th: Trivia Night! Teams of up to 4 residents can compete for $98 off of next month's Rent!

Community Spotlight

This month, Management would like to spotlight Millard Filmore, the 13th President of the United States and current temporally-displaced resident! Although some might say he was one of the worst and most ineffectual presidents of that country, he has done well in being on time (and sometimes early!) with Rent his entire time while residing here with us. Next time you see him in the hallways, be sure to give the former Commander In Chief a hearty salute for his personal fiscal responsibility!

Final Note

As the official representative of Management, it is my duty to ensure that their messages get out on time and cover all information relevant for the month! I have been encouraged to take any questions and requests from residents regarding their life in our apartments. If you have any, send them in!

_{*MANAGEMENT RESERVES THE RIGHT TO CLAIM UP TO 98% OF ANY WINNINGS}