I went to a family gathering today for my aunts' birthday and it felt so alienating. The things my family cares about is so different from what I care about.
The biggest thing by far is that at least 75% of all the conversations I took part in or overheard were about jobs. I'm under NDA. I can not talk about my job beyond "I test video games" or "I do certification testing for a gaming device". But all they talked about was jobs. Never "what do you do in your free time" or "what do you like doing". Even when I had a chance to talk about what was important to me, they quickly changed the subject.
I write, I draw, I make little crafts (one of which I was literally wearing the whole night), I'm learning a language, I play games, I spend time with loved ones, I'm making long term plans, etc. There is just so much more to me than what I dislike doing most in my day to day life.
I'm also the only gay cousin of the family which means that there's yet another disconnect there. They are thankfully generally supportive, which I appreciate a lot, but I can feel like they just don't really get it most of the time. I don't expect them to, but it is a huge part of me that they don't even know exists.
I love my family, but I just can't help but feel like a stranger around them.
I think I figured out what really bothered me most. The way they were talking about money. As if always going for more and more is what you should do, no matter the cost. It makes sense for some of them to think like that. After all, young parents who just bought a big house for the whole family do need a lot of money. But it is not what I want nor is it what I currently have plans for.