welcome to the choost adventure engine!
would you like to play a game?
play
welcome adventurer, to a quest of great sights and wonders!
you find yourself in a beautiful village just off the highway. what will your first action be?
you find yourself in a beautiful village just off the highway. what will your first action be?
get mad swole at the gym
nice idea! getting buff is a healthy part of any balanced breakfast!
you bunnyhop to the gym, building up incredible forward velocity. you smash through the gym doors and front roll into the main training area. what will you train with?
you bunnyhop to the gym, building up incredible forward velocity. you smash through the gym doors and front roll into the main training area. what will you train with?
the dumbbells
what did you just call me, punk?
w-what?
don't play dumb with me, what did you just call me?
i-i didn't...
you didn't? hm? you insult a shark and pretend you didn't do it? do you want to know what sharks do to prey like you?
I'm sorry please don't eat me
fine. I won't. anyway you have a grand ol time with the dumbbells but you eventually die of old age
you got the "full and peaceful life" ending!
you got the "full and peaceful life" ending!
why am I turned on right now
you got the "we're all perverts here!" ending!
whatever that thing is
what? oh. oh that thing. you sure? I'm pretty sure all that rusty stuff is dried blood splatter.
yeah lets do it!
ok! you get into the contraption and almost immediately your skull is unceremoniously ripped from your head, leaving it looking like a deflated party balloon. feels great on your quads, though.
you got the "feel the burn" ending!
you got the "feel the burn" ending!
look at real estate
ah! looking to settle down already? what joy! you open up the classifieds and find three potential real estate investments, which do you choose?
the quaint corner loft
good choice! this stunning property on the corner of whatever street and wherever boulevard makes you feel tingly in places you didn't even know could feel tingly. so... sooo tingly. oh goodness... I think... I think you're gonna marry this house?
you got the "conjugal rental" ending!
you got the "conjugal rental" ending!
a beautiful seaside suite
beautiful! so beautiful! too beautiful! it's just beautiful! that's it! beautiful! the beaut! beautiful! beautiful! beautiful! beautiful!
you got the "beautiful" ending!
you got the "beautiful" ending!
swamp hole
oh. oh god. you've picked the swamp hole. do you understand the implications of your choice?
of course
oh. I see. oh well. I guess we're going to the swamp hole.
the swamp hole beckons.
the swamp hole beckons.
enter the swamp hole
you got the "swamp hole" ending!
what?
oh god. you don't even know what you've done.
the swamp hole beckons.
the swamp hole beckons.
RUN
you run as fast as you can, as far as you can, but you can never escape the swamp hole.
you got the "swamp hole" ending!
you got the "swamp hole" ending!
Honestly after seeing this again I'm tempted to fork it and Make A Thing no cap
A thing! I may add more on later but for now it's I think ready for posting~
welcome to the choost adventure engine!
would you like to play a game?
play
You've had a long day, and you're looking to relax.
follow the whims of your phone's notification feed (blanket cw for unreality and derealization)
It's. A mess. It's always a mess. You've only got maybe three apps sending you notifications but somehow it always seems like there's So Much
just click the first thing you see
Assuming you meant "the first notification" and not "the first thing", it's an email notification. You don't check your email often, so your inbox is more than a little full
continue your "caution to the wind" approach by clicking the first email, following the first link, and so on until you reach... something
Time passes, and you migrate to your computer. You eventually land on an old-school web 1.0 website, "afoema.gov". It's a blank page with only one link, and a warning. "By continuing, you agree to waive liability for physchological and other effects of any material contained within."
"Enter"
It's blank. An empty page. Something about that color though... it's so alluring
get the hex code, you're certain this color alone would make for a beautiful wallpaper!
#NANNAN
What? It's not even NAN, as in Not A Number. That's just the hex code.
#NANNAN
You know that hex codes only go up to F, but that's what you're seeing. And the color itself... it's like magenta's unholy bastard child, only instead of simply failing to fall on the visible light spectrum it somehow fails to remain within... any spectrum
What? It's not even NAN, as in Not A Number. That's just the hex code.
#NANNAN
You know that hex codes only go up to F, but that's what you're seeing. And the color itself... it's like magenta's unholy bastard child, only instead of simply failing to fall on the visible light spectrum it somehow fails to remain within... any spectrum
LOOK. AWAY.
You try to turn away from the screen but your mind is immediately flooded with nothing but the color that doesn't exist. It all makes sense now and it's terrible; your mind grasps at air and finds purchase. Now it exists inside you and the only way to excise it is to see it again. The color that doesn't exist, that can't exist, that never has.
look back
Your gaze once again falls upon the screen, but the page isn't blank anymore
close the inspection window
Center for the Acquisition and Deployment of Anomalous Objects: Infohazard Archive
Contents viewable only to class three or higher parasophont beings. Vulnerable parties should be unable to perceive this page for their own wellbeing and safety, and must not be allowed access to any of the information contained within, regardless of security clearance level
The contents of the page consist of various linkouts to infohazards you're now, apparently, immune to
You got the "eyes open" ending!
Contents viewable only to class three or higher parasophont beings. Vulnerable parties should be unable to perceive this page for their own wellbeing and safety, and must not be allowed access to any of the information contained within, regardless of security clearance level
The contents of the page consist of various linkouts to infohazards you're now, apparently, immune to
You got the "eyes open" ending!
afoema? dot gov?? You want to get some more context before continuing
After hours and hours of nonstop searching through obviously unrelated stuff, you find some defunct conspiracy forum on the web archive. So far it's the only thing that even seems related. "Acronym For the Obfuscation of Extranormal Memetic Anomolies". Pure fiction, surely, but it's the only lead you have...
continue your search
Unfortunately, all you can find is overtly fictional content: creepypastas and the like. However the more you search, the more you find things sliding off your mind. What was it you were doing in the first place? You're really quite hungry
grab a bite to eat
When you return to your computer, your browser is as clear of evidence as your mind.
You got the "effective deterrent" ending!
You got the "effective deterrent" ending!
youtube infotainment
You learned so much about the design principles of modern architecture! Too much! You see it in your dreams! A tower stretching to the sky, so tall it vanishes in the atmosphere! A tower that reaches forever, yet is climbed with a single step! You have to build it, the shapes are scrawled upon your mind. You hear the unification of euclidian and noneuclidian forms in a beautiful, horrible, somehow orderly cacophony you understand All Too Well. Your life's work will never be complete, but at long last you have Direction
You got the "inspirational content" ending!
You got the "inspirational content" ending!
check social media
A gamble, for sure, but it might pay off. What social media platform are you checking?
twitter dot com
Oh. Oh no. Not that place again.
You've got 17 notifications!
And. 15 of them are bad faith replies from The Worst Kind Of People
And the other two are likes and retweets on those
You've got 17 notifications!
And. 15 of them are bad faith replies from The Worst Kind Of People
And the other two are likes and retweets on those
despair
Often you question why you visit the hellsite any more. It doesn't help, in fact you're more worn out than you were before you opened it.
You got the "every third time I look at twitter" ending!
You got the "every third time I look at twitter" ending!
discord
Does that count? I don't think that counts but I guess that's your biz.
You chat in PMs with some of your friends. It's nice, but you still feel like something's missing...
You got the "well enough" ending!
You chat in PMs with some of your friends. It's nice, but you still feel like something's missing...
You got the "well enough" ending!
cohost!
Eggbug sees all. Eggbug is all. We are eggbug. You are eggbug
All is eggbug, and thus all is well. You live out your life in peace and harmony as an eggbug
You got the "eggbug" ending!
You got the "eggbug" ending!
Bonus game is to figure out what order I wrote the routes in because cheeses they got more complex as I went on
