me, staring directly into my wife's eyes: we should lady and the tramp an entire raw onion

Electronic literature, tool-building, poetry, games, puzzles, &cet. 29.
me, staring directly into my wife's eyes: we should lady and the tramp an entire raw onion
see if you do a green onion you can actually make it work. but which of you gets the green end and which gets the white end?