I hope this email finds you, binds you,
ties you to a pole and breaks your fingers to splinters,
drags you to a hole until you wake up, naked,
clawing at the ceiling of your grave.

I hope this email finds you, binds you,
ties you to a pole and breaks your fingers to splinters,
drags you to a hole until you wake up, naked,
clawing at the ceiling of your grave.
there is one thing i must say to you
as you sail across the sea
always these deals will watch you over you
buy one or more, get two for free
it took me fifteen years
to gather all these leads
but now i’ve got you on my list.
and i will send you deals!
promotional emails!
for ne’er an hour will i desist!
It gives my heart great joy to see your 'box filled with spam
Click unsubscribe, see if that works, I don't give a damn
Ohhhhhhh-ohhhhhhhh
[jaunty accordion outro]