why did i think this was an Intel advertisement at first

Unemployed 30-something slinger of too many words. Would happily invite people into my own little worlds if only anybody asked. I own an unwise amount of golf simulators (approaching four shelves now!) and otherwise tinker with retro computers and assorted video game nonsense.
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why did i think this was an Intel advertisement at first
The sign in full just sounds like the opening to a song
"No skate boarding roller blading bicycle riding..."