wobblegong

Thinkin' about animals....

  • 🐟/🐠/they/them

deviantArt: jWobblegong

*tiny furry cheeps*


bazelgeuse-apologist
@bazelgeuse-apologist asked:

Let's say that you can have any creature in the world as a pet. They'll have a habitat they'll be completely happy in, get top-notch care, and it won't cost you anything. Also the creature is friendly and poses no danger to you, and there are no ethical concerns about procurement because it was conjured from thin air by ✨ pure wish-fulfillment magic. ✨

Which creature do you choose?

...fffffuuuuUUUUU... this is a hard one!!! But accounting for social needs– there's a lot of theoretical pets I would never own purely because they need to live with lots of friends!– I will tentatively arrive at tegu!

Salvator merianae, the Argentine black and white tegu, are extremely large and intelligent lizards native to South America. They have a somewhat unexpected quirk: wild ones are famously hostile to humans, but tegu reared from eggs by humans are super friendly to people. Like, the friendliest. Here's a video of a breeder delivering food to a pen of juvenile-ish tegu and having the dinner roundly fuckin' ignored because friend? hello! friend? :D? They can be taught to play games like fetch, especially if you start when they're really young. The glib, inaccurate, but not entirely wrong line I like to pull out is "tegus are for if you want a dog but make it a lizard instead."

They're semi-high maintenance pets and really can't be ethically kept outside climates that match their home range– which is true of a lot of herps, but the usual workaround of "build them the sickest terrarium that's ritz as hell and meets all their needs" gets extremely challenging when the lizard in question is going to be AT LEAST a meter long. The standard advice is in fact "let it roam the house. and supervise it in the yard" but again... the climate problem is pretty gnarly for them, I've heard they can start getting all kinds of Exciting Herpetological Maladies like bone deformations. :(

While I can confirm some parts of the continental USA are suitable habitat (particularly a state whose name starts with F and rhymes with Lorida) the magic wish would cure any climate-control troubles. And as best I know they're smart/cool with their fellows but okay living solo in a human home. And they're gorgeous, adorable, charismatic as hell, and all around one of the choicest lizards I know of, so! That can be my magic wish.


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