Earlier in the day I passed up the opportunity to have someone massage my shoulders (or do anything in that vein) and now, hours later, I'm experiencing the kind of regret that leads to wondering if balancing a 5lb bag of rice on a door and then closing the door real fast so it falls on me would improve things.
"How would dropping something heavy on yourself improve things?"
Listen. If I comically squish myself into a fishbirdthing pancake, I will at least have a DIFFERENT problem than my current "my shoulders feel like solid rocks that invented muscles just to experience muscle tension" issue.
