so yeah one time this lady bought a potion from me that makes you irresistible to your crush. so she drank it right in the store and just started BELCHING like a motherfucker, this girl could NOT stop and demanded a fix and a refund and got soooo mad. I offered her some duct tape and she didn't get it, so I took the liberty of taking her mouth shut myself. But all that did was make her start gurgling and bubbling all funny and her clothes started getting tight, so I yanked the tape off and she burped so loud and constantly for the next hour she gave up and left (finally, thank God). Yeah turns out her crush was a freak who loves gassy women. And I mean, they got married like a month later, so, hey. But she didn't even apologize, or tip. Bitch.
