XeniaNuminous

been feeling into the heart more and more. It used to be that we couldn't really connect with that idea in any way other than intellectualizing it and trying to guess at what the feelings are meant by using the heart as a metaphore.

Lately we've gotten away from all that and it's really quite wonderful. The heart isn't some nebulous idea anymore, it's not a metaphor, it's not empty filigree of words. It's our actual, physical beating flesh in our chest. The Life pump, beating blod through all our body, that's the heart. And just sitting in meditation every day and focusing on the feeling of our heart beating has really helped us a lot. It's wonderful <3

Came out of a long meditation like that, in which we also visualized healing white light coming into our heart from mother earth and father sky, and wow. our actual chest feels full of energy and love! It's easier to make decisions because we can make them more from the heart now! We wrote a whole little resume-type-thing that we had no idea what to write earlier because we wrote it from he heart! <333

Unfollow me if you hate this kind of content because this is what I"m all about <333 Shoutout to the DONKEY headmate (no ass puns plz) who keeps us on track with meditation. Love you girl, love you so much. <3

• frontstuck deer.

No ass puns for me please. Just for everyone who's curious we usually do sober sitting zazen-style zen meditation, where you lovingly dismiss your thoughts as they come into your mind without judging yourself for the content of the thoughts. A helpful way some teacher put it was like this "let your thoughts come and go, but do not serve them tea." Also, when you notice you're lost in your thoughts and need to come back to the present moment, you didn't fail you sucedeed :2 because you noticed and now you're coming back. Useful way to help that feel more positive, instead of like a failure, is to just say to yourself "thoughts, good girl, thoughts." This helps us a lot because it means every time we wander we get to bring ourselves back with a bit of gender euphoria. <3 Could use good boy, good dog, etc.

Anyway zazen I don't think mentions specifically focusing on your heart, most of what we read says to focus on your breath. Which is also very good and there's things you'll get from the breath more than the heart, but for building heart-centered awareness just feeling into your heart is really wonderful.

Can you feel it beating? Can you hear it, if your surroundings are quiet enough? Can you tell it's beating from other parts of your body and then follow the sensation back to the source? Does it ache with emotions? Does it feel light and airy and full of love?

Can you feel it beating?

So much more to write about this in the future maybe but in the meantime seriously. Queer community! Let's meditate and work to better ourselves! <3333

-- the feral donkey.

Also, just as a bonus, if you haven't tried chanting the chakra mantras (yam, pronounced yum, is the heart mantra) while you're high on cannabis it's very nice <3

-- moon

Making friends as an adult is a difficult endeavor. It's our tendency, certainly, to overthink things, but the landscape of the internet being the best shot to find other minorities leaves us a bit caught between to worlds. We want to be unplugged and present in our own life, living simply and with animals.

The want to connect though drives us to online spaces. The want to put our art out there too. Curious if anyone else has thoughts on this, it'd be nice to get a broaer perspective.

--moon

Mmmmm. Nooo but you are making us wonder a bit ^^

Before we figured out we were therians some years ago, we went through some months where we saw ourselves as a foxtaur! We always saw ourselves as an anthro fox, and our therian feelings made us want to be on four legs and, be super good at giving cuddles. Eventually figured out that, oh! That's because we are actually aminals! And the taur feelings went away as we realised we felt most comfy as a feral fox. We kinda forgot all about it!

Looking back on it, we really liked being biiig and and purrfect for cuddles and hugs and rides for our friends. Who knows, maybe someday taur fluffs will show up, or a fluffs will turn taur nodnod

This is super cute by the way, whichever heartmate wrote this. <3 I think we went through the same feels with being a deer taur, possibly for the same reason! Being a taur meant being on all four legs and having all the nice cloven hooves on the ground <3 but it still gave us hands and stuff. And we'd totally love our friends to hop on and ride us too. <3 Hadn't thought about that in a while. We, the hosts, go back and forth between feral and anthro forms all the time, maybe we'll try taur again and see how that feels for us~ :3